Finding Joy in the Journey

As most of you know the last few months of our lives have been a roller coaster of emotions. In a matter of minutes I watched our lives turn completely upside down and in that moment I didn't know if we would ever be able to recover; but I am here to tell you that we did recover and we have found joy in our journey. 

Those first few weeks after everything happened I was a mess. I wanted to curl up in a ball and never come out. I was devastated. I was terrified at what I was being faced with and I didn't know where to turn. I was angry that this was happening to me and I had absolutely no control over it. In one night I lost my husband, my home, my source of income, I felt like all my dreams were being ripped from me and all I could do was sit back and watch. I didn't understand why this was happening to us. I had done everything I could possibly do to hold things together and it just wasn't enough. I quickly learned that no matter how hard you try, you can't control what other people do. Heavenly Father gave each of us our agency and no one can take that away from us. I found that I had to trust in the Lord that things were going to work out, even though it seemed impossible in that moment. I knew that the Lord wasn't going to give Logan and I anything that we couldn't handle, but there were times when I found myself asking, "Are you sure you've got the right person Heavenly Father? Maybe someone else could handle this but surely I can't." Well guess what, He was right and I did. He knew how strong I was even when I didn't. 


In that strength I have been able to find happiness, a happiness that I haven't felt in years. It took going through pain I didn't even know I was capable of feeling, but without that pain I would never be able to fully appreciate the happiness that I feel now. I am surrounded by people all over the world who have reached out to me to show their love and support; people who are proud of me and are excited to see the woman I have become. Sometimes we don't have control over what life throws at us, at times it seems completely unfair, and like we are totally alone in this world, but I am here to say that no matter what life throws at us, we can recover and find happiness again. I've gained a greater appreciation for the little things in my life, for my sweet little Logan. It hasn't been an easy road to get here, but we can finally say that we have found the joy in the journey and we couldn't be happier!